Job Interview Struggles: What I've Learnt

Having quit my job as an Account Manager at a digital marketing agency to move to Sydney unemployed, I have had my fair share of job application mares. I have, however, learnt quite a few things about myself along the way which I hope you can both laugh at, empathise with and learn from.  

I’ve handed out so many CVs, applied online to umpteen roles and here I am, four weeks later, still unemployed and getting scarily close to the bottom of my savings. I've had three interviews so far; interviews for roles, which on paper, I am totally qualified for. But interviews which I have been far from successful in and have led me to reassess a few things about myself:

How To Be Happy: The Next Chapter

Though it’s easy to scoff at the horribly cliché title of this blog post, I’m hoping that if my life were in book form, the next few months would prove to be the ultimate page-turner. As a literature fiend, a truly sickening book metaphor seems to be the easiest way to shout out to the world that I’m moving to Australia. Cue the dramatic ‘duh, duh, duhhhhh’.

A few months ago, I wrote a blog post that I chose not to publish. The basic tone of such post was I'm soo bored I hate my life woe is meeeee and nobody’s got time to listen to a measly excuse of a blogger waffling on about her sorrows when our lives are often hard enough to manage on their own. I was down in the dumps, unsatisfied, a grumpy grizzly, if you will. After a hefty few months of wallowing, I decided that my slightly unhinged and flat life needed a re-service. After all, do things really need to be 100% broken to warrant the need to be fixed?

In an attempt to bid farewell to the sulk, I culled everything that no longer made me happy because, let's cut to the chase here, it is completely okay to focus on your own happiness. You are allowed to travel and live where you want, spend your money on nice things or sometimes tell friends you just want a night in. To think about your own happiness doesn’t make you selfish, it encourages you to take control of your emotions. It is futile to push on believing that things will fix themselves if you just sit back and watch life pass by.

How to tell fear to do one

Life can be a pretty intimidating and daunting ride.

In our twenties, it’s unlikely we have any sense of direction, we are all pretty broke and we probably spend the majority of our free time crying 'WHY ME WHYYY' having necked about ten tequilas the night before. Ok, so the latter might just be me, but when life’s path isn’t fully laid out for us, anxiety can take over.

Where will we be in five years time? Are we ever going to pay off the debt we owe? Or find that one person who makes nothing else really matter to save us growing old with cats? (Crazy cat lady is my middle name, hi.) Yes, life can be pretty scary and there are many experiences that lie ahead that are bound to make our hearts skip a beat or stomachs turn twice over. But I’m certain that it’s the things that scare us the most, which are the most empowering once overcome.

In my opinion, if you’re not shitting yourself, you’re not experience something new.

The Importance of Being Mindful

So it’s the first day of a fresh new month. The sun is shining more than it’s raining, when we finish work at 5.30pm it’s still light outside and we are one month closer to summer. One might say we have quite a lot to be happy about. However, the reality is that no matter how bloody beautiful it is outside or how swimmingly well our lives are going, the twenty-first century human being has a habit of either dwelling on the past, or worrying about the future. The present ‘now’ doesn’t become a sincerely meaningful thing until tomorrow comes and it’s transformed into the past.

As humans, we are very very bad at appreciating the present moment. Actually, not even appreciating it but merely living it. Everything boils down to yesterday or tomorrow. But what about right now? Like, right this second? How are you feeling? The past has been and gone and you’re never going to create a time-machine, so really, the most important moments of our lives are the ones that we’re drifting straight through whilst our busy minds are set to autopilot.

What it means to be Sassy.

Sass; my favourite word of all time, and as predicted back in January, the word of 2015.  As Google tells us, being sassy is to be lively, bold and full of spirit. To achieve this you must dress in a way that makes you feel flawlessly confident, chuck in a pinch of ‘I don’t give a fuck’, stir in the ability to take the piss out of yourself and if you really fancy, throw in some heels for good measure. But maybe that’s just me.

So far, 2015 has probably been my favourite year of the 22 years of my life and I thought I’d share some top tips on what I’ve done to make this possible.

1. Go on lots of dates.

In the day in age of ‘Netflix and chill’, it might be depressing that very few people seem capable of initial face to face interaction, but with the likes of Tinder, at least we are provided with an unlimited sea of unsuspecting, be it mostly basic, men and women to date. Some will be horrendous to the point of hysteria and very few will be anything more than mediocre. But you know what, getting dressed up and going for a drink with somebody new is often quite empowering, and ultimately, a bit of a laugh.  

2. Dress accordingly.  

It’s basically a fact that if you feel good about your appearance, you will ooze confidence, be more efficient and productivity levels will therefore skyrocket. A slob fest is great once in a while, but you’re going to feel far from sassy in your criminal see-through leggings and Nike trainers. If you’re dressing to impress others though, you’re doing it for the wrong reasons. Dress in a way that makes you think, ‘Hi today, I’m going to own you.’  

3. GAF (give a fuck?)

Somebody says something that should probably bother you, but really, GAF? Obviously don’t rid of all your human compassion and empathy, that would just make you a dick, but do try to care a bit less about what other people think. If you’re not hurting anybody in the process and you’re doing what makes you happy, then you’re doing it right.

4. Be a bit weird.

Nobody likes normal.  The ability to laugh at yourself and not take yourself too seriously is a great one. There are times to be serious, and there are times when this is just boring. Don’t be one of those people that has the same pose in every single photo; pull a face, have a laugh and of course, see above.

5. Don’t hold on to the past.

It’s inevitable in life that human relationships change and people will grow apart. Try to review the past with feelings of contentment and untainted nostalgia and don’t cling on to something that isn’t providing you with any value anymore. It’s a waste of your energy.

6. Work hard, play hard.

Put everything in to your passions and dreams. Political activism, travel, career, whatever. Don’t do it half-heartedly and commit to success. Being driven and ambitious is, in my opinion, one of the most fundamental traits to leading a fulfilled lifestyle. Remember though, work is just one element of a wider picture. Drink martinis and slut drop once in a while, I dare you.

So there we have it, a few top tips on how to grab the rest of 2015 by the balls and own it. I urge you all to stop caring so much about how other people around you perceive you and what it is that makes you happy. Being sassy doesn’t involve anybody else, it involves you committing to what you believe in.  Go get ‘em.

How to tell the January blues to do one.

So we all know the 'new year new me' hype is utter bullshit - you're still the same person you were last month, maybe just slightly porkier and with a bag full of regrets from your crazy drunkenness on New Years Eve'.

However, even if January is the shittest month known to man - we're on a comedown from the festive period, we're skint, it's raining (cry me a river) - I realised as I was walking along minding my own business that I had absolutely no reason to feel crap. I might not have any exotic holidays planned or that Burberry trench coat that I am so badly yearning for, but what I do have is just fine. That's where the difference between happiness and contentment comes in. 

Every time we're not truly happy with every single aspect of our lives, we mistake it for unhappiness. We achieve everything we've ever wanted, we obtain all material goods to satisfy, and yet our happiness lasts for about a week before we strive for the next big thing and we're not truly settled until we get it. 

I'm not being a moron, insinuating that people aren't ever unhappy, I'm simply iterating that being content with what you do have should be that which makes you smile, because sometimes, true happiness 100% of the time just isn't possible.

CONTENTMENT  Having one’s desire bound by what one has (though that may be less than one could have wished); not disturbed by the desire of anything more, or of anything different; satisfied so as not to repine.

Restless and discontent, we always have that one thing we desire and strive for. Ambition is everything, striving for material goods or temporary highs to make you happy is not. Of course, nobody should have to settle, and though the dichotomy between happiness and unhappiness is vast, it should never be either/or.  Contentment is the medium that I am quite satisfied to place myself in. Unfortunately it would be naive to expect everybody to be happy every single second of every waking day. Contentment is realising that although you might not have much to look forward to this month and you might not have the money you strive for and that one person you're after, you're content with the things you do have.

It is the long term solution that everyone needs to be reminded of once in a while; the mother, the life long friendship that you couldn't live without. Happiness is the short term burst of energy and euphoria and that which is not constant; the drunken night out or that amazing Dominoes pizza. Sure, strive for constant happiness, please do. But know that if you meditate hard on the conditions that you couldn't live without, you will find contentment right in front of you.

Why it's okay to be a bit lost in your twenties.

So this isn't a particularly revolutionary post, or one with controversial views, it's simply an innocent rambling stemmed from the quote below:

‘Nothing will ruin your 20s more than thinking you should already have your life together.’

If there was ever a 'quote to live by', that right there, would be it. I  aways just presumed that by my twenties I would have my shit together and know exactly where I was going with my life. But when I think about where I will be in five years time, I have absolutely no idea, and although this is terrifying, it should be exciting too.

Traditionally, you go through the whirlwind of final year at University, you graduate from the most exciting three years of your life, and then it simply feels like you've been shoved off a plank into the deep end, not knowing what direction is up.

When we look at the instagrams of colleagues, friends and that random girl we just like to stalk, we just assume that everybody's life is so much more glamorous and exciting than our own. When we feel a bit shit or are having a generally down day, we use social media as our point of reference to feel so much worse (that Walden filter on instagram can make anything look worthy of envy). But guess what, it's okay to feel lost and a little bit shit. Stop comparing your life to other people's. We're not supposed to have our shit together and that means that we can get away with so much more.

We're at that wonderful age when we can still get away with lying in bed all day hungover on a Saturday, but we now simultaneously have responsibilities that we dreamt of when we were in our early teens; having your own place, working in an office and being able to wear heels in the day. I'm not one for the cringe factor, but for now I'm going to have to suck it, as your twenties are about exploring, making mistakes, going on awful dates, getting too drunk and learning about yourself.

I realise I'm writing this as if only twenty-somethings are reading, but whether you're nostalgic for the past or desperately clinging to your teen years, know that you can look back on or look forward to your twenties in it's entirety. So I'm just going to sit here in my jammies with a cup of tea on a Sunday afternoon and look forward to next weekend when as routine states, I will be getting pissed as a fart and eating too much unhealthy food. Because I can.